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why are we like this ?

  why are we like this? oh my god— why are we like this, hearts full yet hands still reaching for something unnamed? why is contentment a shy guest who never stays the night? i have food, a home, people who speak my name— the basics of being human, the foundations they say should be enough— and still my mind wanders off into the dark corners asking, what do you want? what do you really want? what is love to us— a warm place to rest, or another mirror showing us the parts we’re afraid to meet? where am i now, really— in the world, or deep inside myself with the lights turned low? and when the self thins, when the questions echo— have i had ego death, or is it something gentler: the soul shifting, stretching, remembering? and sometimes i wonder— is this just me dodging responsibilities, pulling away from the weight of reality, trying to slip into a softer dream? or is it simply the heart wanting space to breathe?

Held Too Gently to Resist

She said, “Don’t love me this hard,” Whispered into the dark, Cause the way he held her Melted every hidden part She could feel it in the quiet, In the warmth of his arms, Lying there, unfolding slowly, Pouring out her heart unarmed And he held her like a promise, No trembling, no guard, Taking every piece she offered, Holding it so easy, so unscarred That’s why she whispered, “Don’t love me this hard.” 💓
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  Echoes of Transition: The Knock at the Heart In the ethereal landscape of transition, I am enveloped by a profound sense of metamorphosis. Every fiber of my being resonates with the subtle whispers of change, as if my very essence is undergoing a delicate evolution. My reflection, once familiar, now bears the traces of transformation, an outward manifestation of the internal journey unfurling within. As I stand at the threshold of matrimony, a symphony of emotions courses through me, orchestrating a dance of anticipation and trepidation. The contours of my existence blur as I confront the imminent divergence from the familiar paths of solitude. In the crucible of commitment, I am compelled to confront the enigma of identity—who am I, amidst the shifting tides of change? Despite feeling grateful for the love I have, I'm also haunted by fears of losing it, experiencing heartbreak, and struggling to define myself. It's a complex mix of emotions—gratitude for love alongside uncer...

Is this Real?

He offers a love so pure, so true, Yet, my heart resists, unsure what to do. His affection, a melody sweet and rare, Yet, I'm paralyzed by the weight I bear. A dance with vulnerability, a risky waltz, I fear to open up, to break down the walls. What if his love fades like a fleeting flame? Leaving me stranded, lost in the same.

"Eternal Longing"

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In shadows deep, I seek a light, A yearning heart, a silent night. The ache within, a starless sky, Desire for love, I cannot deny. I crave the touch, a gentle hand, A gentle care, a love so grand. But love, a force I cannot own, In solitude, I feel alone. What form of love does my soul require? The soft caress, love's burning fire? Roses, hugs, or early coffee's embrace, Which form of love would fill this space? I long to feel love, it's true, it's real, A hunger deep, an ache to heal. I yearn for warmth, a love so sweet, A love that makes my heart complete. But self-sufficiency, I seek to find, A love that flows from heart and mind. To love myself, to not rely, On others to fill my endless sky. What is love, this mystery profound? In every corner, in every sound. Love is the force that binds us tight, In darkness and in the brightest light. A journey inward, a path I trod, To find the love that's born of God. A love that's deep, forever true, Within myself, I ...

Intact Blossoms

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  Intact Blossoms Innocence and selflessness, a heart so pure, With a past to bear, a story to endure. Both light and shadow, a complex blend, Good and bad deeds, on life's path they wend. Love, the sweetest peril, a paradox complete, Dangerous and lovely, emotions bittersweet. In its warm embrace, a safe haven found, Trust bloomed anew on solid ground. Reciprocal and pure, love's flame aglow, Yet pain arrived, like winds that blow. In a blink, it vanished, dreams scattered away, Sleepless nights and tears, darkness held sway. Impatient and numb, trauma's icy grasp, Shaking and crying, as time slowly passed. A difficult phase, a storm within the soul, A laughter-masked face, a heart in turmoil. Love persisted still, unwavering and true, But the time had come, a tough choice to do. Letting go, like releasing a captive dove, A painful step, to reclaim a life to love. Just as the journey seemed to mend its way, A proposal extended, emotions in disarray. Lost once more, confusi...

Reflecting on Growth: Memories and Strength

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    Memories captured in frames of old A time when I was young and bold I look back now with a heavy heart Feeling sadness, tearing me apart I see myself, so carefree and wild Innocent, happy, like a child But life has a way of changing us all Making us stumble, making us fall And yet, as I look at myself today I feel a sense of strength that won't sway I see the person I have become Mature, resilient, not easily undone The road was long and not always fair But I made it through, with scars to bear And as I reflect on my journey past I know that my struggles were not in vain, they'll last For they shaped me into who I am today And though it may be hard, I will not sway I'll keep moving forward, day by day Stronger and wiser in every way.